Do you consider yourself rich? No, not rich in love or family or experience. I mean the kind of rich that really matters. The kind of rich you can count, the kind that makes people you don’t know become your best friend.

If you do consider yourself rich, I feel like I’m about to burst your bubble. A Charles Schwab survey found some people only consider themselves worthy if they have a net worth of $2.5 million.

I assume that eliminated pretty much everybody around here. And if that didn’t eliminate you, why don’t you come over and hang out sometime. I bet we could be the best of friends!

Let’s lower our sights a little.

By government standards, if you have a net worth of $500,001, you’re considered rich. Not $500,000. You broke jackanapes can hit the road. That extra dollar makes all the difference.

If you’re a couple, then you need a net worth of $600,000 to be rich, no extra dollar needed. Still not doing it for you? Where does $12 an hour and no savings rank on being rich, you ask? Well, let’s see…

Sorry, can’t find it.

We can go state by state and see what you need to be considered rich. Business Insider, using census data from 2012-2016, recently put out a list of what you need to be considered rich based on the income in the state’s biggest city. Where did us fine folks in Tennessee rank? Let’s take a look.

The state where it’s easiest to be considered rich is Michigan where the average income in Detroit is $52,498. Considering Detroit is almost a third world country, that sounds about right.

Our neighbors to the south in Birmingham, Ala., is the next easiest path to being thought of as rich with only $64,808 needed to be thought of with the Rockefeller’s. So, come this fall, you can say, “You might have beat us 84-0 on the football field, but we’re richer than you!”

Jackson, Miss., is next at $65,732, then you have Newark, N.J., at $66,050, Milwaukee, Wis., at $73,602…

Ah, here we have Tennessee at number 46, meaning it’s the fifth easiest state to be thought of as rich.

Can you guess the city and the income? Well, the city is easy as Memphis is by far the biggest city in the state. The amount of money you need yearly to be considered rich there, and ergo the state? Well, $73,950.

Did you make it? Are you considered rich? I can’t speak for anybody else, but me, I didn’t even come close.

Business insiders came up with these numbers by doubling the median household income for each state. In Tennessee that number is $36,975. If you make more than that, but less than $73,950, you’re considered middle class around here. Thanks to a two-income household, I’m comfortably middle class, Without that second income I’d be looking at houses on Poverty Row.

Going by the Business Insiders study, you have to get to 22nd place and Oklahoma City before you reach six figures needed to be rich. Living in that state you would need $100,140 a year before anybody declared you rich.

The numbers hold steady for a while after that until you reach number 11 and you need $110,382 to be considered rich in New York City. I know nothing about New York City other than what I’ve seen in movies and TV shows, but I would’ve thought this number would be much higher. Has Hollywood been lying to me?

Virginia, at number four, is the wealthiest southern state where you need at least $135,438 a year to be considered rich in Virginia Beach. I’ll be honest and show how stuck in this area I am. I’ve never heard of Virginia Beach, but they’ve apparently got nearly half a million rich people.

Hawaii, everybody’s dream state, is number five with well-tanned residents needing $126,722 to be considered rich in Honolulu.

What are the two top states where you need a lot of money to hang with the elite? Washington state requires you to have at least $148,916 year to be rich, based on Seattle incomes and, drum roll, in Anchorage, Alaska, you need an income of $161,724 to thought of as rich. I’m not an expert on Alaska, but I’m guessing that has something to do with oil. And considering the average high is 37 degrees, in June, would it be worth it?

So, basically, none of us is rich, but we’re rich in other ways! I’ll let you count those ways on your own.

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